Never Gone
by Callalily1013
Summary: She was someone they found out of pure coincidence. No one thought or imagined what her presence would create, but will they be able to hold on to her? Or will she be lost just as predicted.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Hakuouki. & I know that.

I hope you like the story, Please Review and tell me what you think. :)

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Never Gone

Chapter One: You Found Me

Okita, Saito, and Chizuru went out for their daily patrol. As they were walking Chizuru tripped and Okita caught her, "You should be more careful, we wouldn't want our dear little princess to get hurt now would we?" he said with his typical smile.

When Chizuru got her balance back she nodded as she began to walk. They heard people yelling and then an old man ran up to them, "Shinsengumi, they….." he said frantically, "those men took a young lady into that warehouse!" he shouted at Saito, "please, help her!" he shouted as Saito pushed through the crowd with his men following close behind him.

"Saito are you sure about this?" he heard Okita ask behind him.

Saito ignored him as he knocked on the door, "We are the Shinsengumi, open this door or we will take drastic measures." he shouted as the door made a pound.

Saito looked at Okita, who nodded as he brought people to the back. Saito gestured a man to kick the door down, as he did they heard men shout angrily. After his men entered the front, Okita's men entered the back and surrounded all the men who were inside.

The site was truly horrible, there were women who looked as though they were forced to do something they didn't want to. There were a few who looked as though they had been beaten and then some who didn't look like they were healthy.

Saito looked around and noticed a hallway, he looked at it carefully. There stood a man who looked frightened, at that moment he was just exiting a room and then tried to make a run for it. Before he could Saito had already knocked him unconscious.

He walked down the hall, and found the room that man had just exited out of. He cautiously opened the door, and saw a woman who was unconscious. She was tied up and looked at those she had been beaten but she didn't look as bad as she should have. Her brown hair ran along her body until it reached her lower back. She looked as though she was objecting to what the man wanted and was beaten for it.

He walked closer to her, and when he tried to touch her, her eyes opened wide and she quickly pulled away. "Its alright, I won't hurt you." he said trying to get closer to her.

"How many times do you think I've heard that?" she said as she stared at him, he saw her emerald eyes. She looked at him, with strong yet frightened eyes. He tried to get a hold of her arm, but she still pulled away. She tried to stand but she quickly fell, "Oh, so you found a little missy." they heard someone say, they turned to see Okita standing at the door, with his arms crossed.

"Okita, have you checked all the men?" Saito asked as he felt a weight on his shoulder. He turned to see the woman unconscious and leaning on him.

"Oh, now isn't that sweet?" Okita asked as Chizuru entered the room. "Be careful Chizuru, we just interrupted something." Okita said with a smile.

"Chizuru, come check her wounds." Saito ordered the woman still leaning on his shoulder.

"Yes." she answered and hurried towards him. She looked shocked as she quickly looked over the woman's body.

"Are the wounds severe?" Saito asked looking at her.

"There aren't any." Chizuru answered in a stunned voice. They all looked at the woman who was sleeping and then Chizuru showed them her shoulder which had blood all over it but when they looked closely there was no wound.

"Interesting." Okita said in a fascinated tone.

"We should tell Hijikata-san about this." Chizuru said as she looked at the unnamed woman, "Who is she?" she asked.

Saito stood as he asked himself the same question. He quickly exited and made his way back to the headquarters. He had a bunch of questions that needed answering but he'd have to wait to get each one answered.


	2. Chapter 2

Yes, I know this is a late update :(, I'm sorry about that you'd think summer more time to write suddenly (bam) a writersblock. So, sorry about this again. I hope you stay with my story, it is more then appreciated :)

**Disclaimer:_ I don't own Hakuouki Shinsengumi Kitan, I wished I did, cuz I love Saito :D but I don't, that sucks!_**

**_Btw: If I didn't mention might be a love triangle :)_**

**_Lastly, it is more then appreciated if you'd review thanks again :)_**

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Chapter Two: Start From Scratch

Her eyes fluttered open; to her surprise she felt a comfortable blanket covering her. She tried to lift her body but it took a lot my strength then she thought it would.

"Its best if you laid down." she heard someone say, she turned to see a girl with brown haired tied up in a ponytail.

"Who are you?" she asked the brown haired girl, "More importantly where am I?" she asked her voice dead serious, causing Chizuru to feel uneasy.

"Chizuru Yukimura." she answered with a smile.

She felt comfortable enough to give her name, "Suzuki Takeda." she said not looking at Chizuru.

"Huh?" Chizuru asked because she wasn't really paying attention.

"That's my name, Suzuki Takeda." she said again looking at Chizuru with a slightly irritated face.

"Sorry." Chizuru said feeling bad that she angered her.

"No, I'm sorry; I'm just taking my anger out on you." Suzuki paused, "I apologize." she said bowing her head at Chizuru.

There was a knock at the door, and when it opened there stood a tall man with reddish-brown hair and a big smile on his face. Suzuki felt amazed when she saw his eyes were golden-brown ones. "Hey, there little girl, the commander wants to meet with you." he spoke and held out his hand for her to hold onto.

"Nah, I can help myself up but thank you." she said with a smile as she got up and began to walk out the door.

"Get any information out of her?" Sano asked as he looked at Chizuru.

"Only that her name is Suzuki Takeda." she replied with a disappointed look. She felt a hand pet her head, "Don't worry, she doesn't seem like the type to play twenty questions." he said as he began to walk out the door, "Come on Chizuru." he said as she hurried after him.

"In this door?" Suzuki asked as she looked back at Sano and Chizuru. As Sano gave her a nod, she responded with a smile, "Sanosuke Harada." he said as Suzuki gave him a confused look.

"My name." he answered as she gave him an understanding look.

"Suzuki…." she began but was interrupted as he put his hand up, "Its okay I know who you are." he said with a smile.

"Oh." she answered as she knocked on the door in front of her.

"Come in." she heard a male voice reply.

She walked in to see five men sitting in a circle, she looked around to see that all but one looked around her age or older. But there was one who looked like he was Chizuru's age and he had long brown hair that was tied into a ponytail.

Then she looked to see a man with dark black hair whose face would intimidate anyone if it weren't for the welcoming smile on his face. Then one with red hair and a green bandana over his forehead with a friendly smile on his face.

Suzuki couldn't help but blush at his smile it made her felt happy in someway. She looked over to see the two men that she remembered where there with her before she blacked out. Now she could see their faces more clear the one to the left had reddish-brown hair and green eyes that made her feel like hers weren't anything special. But the thing that threw her off was the smirk on his face it sort of scared her.

Then she placed her eyes upon the man she remembered was the one that held her before she knocked out. He was quite handsome, she admitted they all were but to her this man she was looking at right now his looks were all alluring.

"Please sit." she heard the man with the dark hair and welcoming smile say, "I'm Isami Kondo the commander of the Shinsengumi." he said with a small bow.

As Suzuki sat she bowed deeply toward Kondo, "I'm Suzuki Takeda." she said as she lifted her head she saw that most of them were surprised, "Is there something wrong?" she asked a little awkward feeling appearing.

"Your eyes…." the man with green bandana said.

"Its so pretty." the boy with the long brown hair finished.

"Shut up Heisuke!" the larger man said as he pushed Heisuke's shoulder.

"Why you!" Heisuke shouted as he pushed Shinpachi back.

Suzuki smiled at the scene remembering how she used to argue with her sister. They reminded Suzuki of her sister in many ways, "Anyway Takeda-san." the man with the reddish hair and devilish smirk started.

"Yes…?" she stopped not knowing what to call him.

"Souji Okita." he replied with a smile that made Suzuki a little uneasy.

"Souji, you scared her!" Shinpachi said as Suzuki blushed at his comment.

"He didn't frighten me, it's just that, I wanted to ask, why is Chizuru-chan dressed as a boy?" she asked as she looked beside her and then around to see that everyone was a bit surprised. "What?" she asked.

"How did you know?" Heisuke asked as he looked at Suzuki and Chizuru.

"That disguise may fool everyone else but I….have a funny habit of observing what others don't or can't see." she said as she heard the door slide open, she turned around and stopped. Her eyes widen as she caught the sight of the person who just entered the room. She looked at him and he looked at her, "Zuki?" he asked his purple eyes looking at her sharply.

"Toshi-chan?" she asked more surprised then he was.

"How did you?" he asked entering the room.

She turned to him, "Why are you here?" she asked as he sat down beside Kondo and Saito.

"The first time you see me after so long and that's all you ask?" he said as he glared at her.

Suzuki smiled at him, "I'm sorry, I missed you too, Toshi-chan." she said as he gave her a small smile. Everyone sat a bit stunned not knowing what to say or much less how to say it.

"Do you know each other?" asked a silent and uninterested Saito as he stared at Suzuki.

She felt a chill go down her spine as he looked at her, "Toshi and I….." she began as she looked away from him.

"Childhood friends." Hijikata finished as everyone's attention turned to him. He didn't look up from the ground, "What are you doing here?" he asked as he looked up to face her.

"I went looking for Nightfury." she replied with a concerned look.

"Nightfury?" Sano asked a little interest in his tone.

"My dog." she said with a faint smile. "He's a Hokkaido, I haven't seen him in weeks." she said as her face took a sadden expression.

"Well, do you have any place to stay?" Hijikata asked as she looked up at him.

"It's nothing to worry about." she said shrugging while Hijikata looked at her sternly.

"That does not give an answer to my question." he shot her a glare.

Suzuki suddenly felt a twist in her stomach, "No, I don't." she said in a whisper loud enough for him to hear.

"Oh, well, Toshi, why don't we let her stay here?" Kondo offered the idea, "For the time being." he said with a smile as he looked at Suzuki.

Her head shot up as soon as he finished, but before she even had time to object Hijikata nodded. "Chizuru must miss the female company." Hijikata said as Suzuki looked at him.

"Toshi….." she started but was silenced by his hand.

"Until you have a proper place to stay, you will reside here." Hijikata said as he gave her an understood look.

Suzuki gave him a frustrated look but then it suddenly turned into a smile, "You're still that softy." she paused, "Even after all these years, to think you would've changed." she said as she began to giggle. As Hijikata tried to hide his slightly embarrassed face from everyone.

"Well, Souji, why don't you watch over her?" Hijikata said, "Until she gets used to everything." he finished as Okita gave him a smirk.

"Oh, sorry I'm currently too unwell to look after someone." Okita started as his smirk turned into a large grin, "Why not let Saito watch her?" he paused as he saw Saito look up at him, with a bit staggered look. "He is the one that found her." he stopped and smiled, "And it seemed that they were really getting along before I came into the picture." Saito gave him a glare not understanding his actions.

"Commander…" Saito started but was interrupted by Kondo's nodding.

"I think that's a good idea." he said as he gave Saito a smile.

Saito turned to Hijikata his last chance to get out of this mess, "I suppose the company would be a good change." he said as Saito gave him a confused look.

"Don't worry Saito, I don't think she bites." Shinpachi said laughing at him.

"Yeah, you're only saying that because you want her to bite you." Heisuke said as Shinpachi smacked the back of his head.

"Why you?" Heisuke shouted standing about to hit Shinpachi.

"So, its decided Saito you will watch over Suzuki." Hijikata said as he stood, he walked over to Suzuki and gestured her to follow. Smiling she obeyed and followed him out the door. Most of them were interested and followed also, Saito not knowing what to do decided to follow considering he'd have to be her babysitter.

"Where are we going?" Suzuki asked trailing behind Hijikata.

He stayed silent as he continued to walk until he came to a large door. He looked back to see Suzuki didn't understand a thing. He motioned her to look into the room, and when she did she stood still.

"Just like the old one?" he asked as she quickly turned around and hugged him tightly her feet at least a ruler away from the floor.

Hijikata patted her back and Suzuki let go walking into the room. She ran to the room for changing clothes and quickly put on a Kyudo uniform. The outfit consisted of a short-sleeved keiko-gi that is held in place by an obi and navy blue hakama.

Everyone that followed stood at a distance a little stunned that the stranger they had only met today had hugged Hijikata and he didn't get angry. Shinpachi thought maybe it would be better if they had left but Sano went ahead of them saying that he wanted to find out what they were up to.

Everyone followed after Sano, and when they got to the door they stood still. There she was standing opposite them holding a bow and arrow. She looked so concentrated and calm, but there was a hint of danger in her stance, it felt lethal.

Chizuru turned to see Hijikata staring at her with a bit of interest in his eyes, "I hope you haven't gotten rusty." he said with a smirk.

No reply came from Suzuki she just stood there facing the target calm and collected. She looked serious and then after about three minutes they saw her shot the arrow. It traveled far and faster then they had thought within a blink of an eye there it was placed in the middle of the target.

Suzuki's arms dropped in what looked like relief, she took a sigh and then looked at Hijikata, "You nearly had me I thought I wouldn't be able to shot anymore." she said as he looked at her in a somewhat proud face.

Then suddenly they heard claps, Suzuki turned to see everyone standing there and abruptly felt embarrassed. "That was amazing!" Shinpachi said walking to her with a huge smile plastered on his face. "Where did you learn to do that?" he asked her with much interest.

"She is an expert at Kyudo." Hijikata answered as everyone exchanged looks between Suzuki and Hijikata.

"Nah, I'm not that good." she said with an honest tone, "I nearly shot him once." she said looking at Hijikata with a smirk.

"You what?" Shinpachi asked a little stunned.

She looked at him a giggled, "Don't worry that was when I was just beginning." she said waving her hand.

"Well, I'll be off alright?" Hijikata asked as he walked to the door, "behave yourself….." he paused as the men nodded, "I was referring to Suzuki." he said as she glared at his back.

"Demon." she whispered as she heard some of the men chuckle.

"So, how experienced are you?" Sano said as he stood beside her.

"Well, it's not that hard, but I guess I'm pretty experienced." she said as she looked up at him, she couldn't help the blush. Sano was quite handsome and he didn't notice the looks he got from people he passed by.

"Really, can I see you shoot again?" he asked with a smile on his face.

Suzuki tried to hide the blush that covered her face but she failed miserably. She turned away hoping that he didn't notice, then she felt a hand pat her head, "I hope you can show me your skill." she heard him say as a smile crept on her face.

"O…..okay…." she said as he backed away.

Suzuki pulled her hand up and positioned herself ready to fire. She took a deep breath as she closed her eyes and when she opened them she let go of the bow and shot the arrow. It hit the middle of the target and she heard claps. She turned to see the people she just met smiling at her. She gave a tiny bit of sadness in her eyes but looked at them and smiled.

They all caught the small sign of misery in her and all felt that they wanted to know why she was hiding it.

Sano looked at her, "Suzuki, are you alright?" he asked as she could see the concern in his face.

'_Is he really worried about some girl he just met?' _Suzuki asked herself, as she paused for a few seconds and looked up at him, "Now I am." she said with the brightest smile she could muster.

Sano felt a small tug at his heart; she was very beautiful but her smile now that was something that could drive any man crazy. "Ok, that's good to hear." he said as he turned away.

"Huh?" Suzuki didn't get it, she was smart and all but anything concerning love or romance she was very poor at.

"Nothing." he muttered as Shinpachi walked over to them.

"So, we're going patrolling today with Chizuru would you like to accompany us." Shinpachi asked with a large smirk on his face.

Suzuki looked over to Saito, the man who was going to be taking care of her for the next few weeks. He was remarkably handsome and always looked composed. She admired that about him, she remembered she used to know someone almost like him. She tugged at her hair trying to think if it would be safe for her to go or not.

"Don't worry we'll protect you." she heard Sano say as she was knocked back into reality by his hand patting her head.

She looked up to the two handsome men that stood in front of her and smiled deeply. She didn't think much about it but she hoped that her time here would mean something later on in life. As she walked away Sano and Shinpachi shook their head trying to knock out the cute look on her face.

After she put the bow and arrows away she walked to where Saito sat. He looked graceful with his eyes shut yet there was a slight sense of alert around him. She just continued to look at him, having strange and unfamiliar feelings merge within her.

"What?" he spoke, his voice amazed Suzuki it was so beautiful though he had only spoken a single word.

"Nothing, I just thought I'd come and talk to you." she replied as he opened his eyes and faced her.

She sat there stunned at how handsome he looked, "About what?" he asked making her realize where she was.

"Uh…" she paused, "Since we'll be stuck together more then we should get to know each other!" she said excitedly with a big smile.

Saito just sat there not knowing how to respond to her actions. No one really bothered to talk to him; he was the quietest out of the group so it was understandable.

"There's nothing intriguing to know about me." he replied hoping that she'd leave it at that.

"Now that isn't true." she said as she crossed her arms, "there's always something intriguing…" she stressed that word as though she was mocking him, "about someone." she paused looking as though she was thinking.

"Chizuru's kindness is commendable, Heisuke's friendly attitude makes him sociable, Shinpachi's unusual manner makes you want to know more about him, Sano's courageous and compassionate outlook makes him a person you can depend on." she said pausing, "Okita maybe a little bizarre but he isn't someone who would allow people to hurt others for no reason. Kondo gives off the fatherly vibe so you can't help but want to be around him. Toshi easily hides his considerate side by acting distant and cruel but he's always cared about others." she stopped as she looked at him, "Everyone's intriguing in their own special way." she said with a smile at him.

Saito just sat there thinking of a way to react to what she had just said. He was about to say something but was stopped by a sigh, "You're unique in your own way, and I'll just have to wait to find it on my own." she said looking at him with a smile. "I guess all we can do is start from scratch." she said as she held out her hand, "Suzuki Takeda, it's a pleasure to meet you." she said with a smile.

Saito stared at her hand and then looked at her, "Saito Hajime." he replied as she looked at him a bit disappointed that he didn't shake her hand.

"I guess this is a new beginning for everyone." she said as she pulled back her hand and smiled at him, "I'll get you to shake my hand, I know I will." she said grinning as she stood, "I don't give up effortlessly, so expect a day to come when you will shake my hand." she said walking away from him.

Saito had many emotions running thorough him, some of which he had never felt before. But he knew that something was bound to happen with her there, and Saito didn't think it would be such a bad thing.

Suzuki walked in the streets with the Shinsengumi, she didn't pay attention to the whispers of disgust or the glares of anger came to them. Sano walked beside her, "I hope you don't think we're bad because of these guys." he said to her.

Suzuki looked up at him, "Why would I do that?" she asked him as he replied with a confused expression, "I've already seen your true colors, so why would I think differently because of what others do or say?" she asked as she looked at a sweets and candy shop.

Sano caught the look in her eyes, "You like sweet?" he asked as she blushed and turned away, "No." she replied trying to hide her blush, as she felt his presence leave her side. She looked up to see that he entered the shop, and minutes later exited with a bag of sweets.

She looked at him surprised and a bit frustrated with his actions, "Sano?" she asked as he walked in front of her and handed her the bag, "Why did you?" she asked not truly understanding his actions.

"After what you said about me to Saito how couldn't I?" he asked her with a smile.

A deep blush covered her face, _'He heard that!' _she shouted to herself, _'Idiot!' _she thought to herself. "Oh, about that….." she started but was interrupted by the pat on her head.

"I hope your not going to say you regret saying that because it made me happy." he said as he looked at her with a grin. Suzuki felt a tug at her heart as she took a deep breath, Sano was really handsome and really knew how to woo a woman.

"No, I won't but I will take that." she said pulling at the bag as he let it go. She looked up at him and smiled.

After patrolling around they arrived back at the headquarters, Chizuru started at making dinner as Suzuki was about to help her she stopped when she said Souji's leg sticking out the corner of a wall.

"Hello, Okita-san?" she asked as she walked over to the wall. As she turned the corner there he sat unconscious with a painful look on his face.

Suzuki panicked and ran to his side checking his temperature and his pulse. He felt a bit hot and his pulse was abnormal, she quickly pulled his right arm across her back and lifted him. She carried him to the closest room making sure not to accidentally hit him.

She laid him on gently on the futon and ran to the closet hoping to find something to cool him down. She grabbed a cloth and ran out of the well bringing a bucket filled with water with her. She gently placed the cool cloth on his forehead and saw the look of pain in his face.

"Takeda-san?" she heard someone call and recognized the voice as Chizuru's.

"In here." she replied as she heard the door slide open.

"Is Okita-san okay?" Chizuru asked frightened as she ran to Suzuki's side.

"He has a fever but he'll be okay." Suzuki replied not taking her eyes off of Souji, "He's an idiot, he shouldn't have pushed himself this far." she said Chizuru looked at to see the slight relief in her eyes.

"Well, come and eat." Chizuru said as she stood she looked at Suzuki who remained sitting.

"I'll eat later, after I know for sure he's safe." she replied as she sighed, "Tell the rest what happened, but reassure them I'll watch him til he wakes." she finished pulling the cloth off of his forehead and dipping it back into the water.

"Alright, I trust you, Takeda-san." Chizuru said as she began to walk.

"Suzuki, Chizuru-chan." she heard Suzuki say as she smiled at the kindness.

"You really pushed yourself." she paused looked at Souji, "baka." she finished with a small smile.

"Don't call me that." she heard him reply, she sat there a bit surprised, "No, you shouldn't have gone this far." she said in a strict tone, "I'm just glad your safe." she answered with a smile on her face.

"I'll be fine." he said trying to get up but fell back down. He expected to hit the floor but felt a pair of arms catch him, "Yup, just fine." she said with mockery in her voice.

"I know how this feels, to think you're worthless." she paused, "just get better and then prove everyone wrong." she looked at him with a smile, "that's when you'll know you weren't ever useless." she said as he pulled away.

"Like I need to hear that from you." he said as he paid back down.

She smiled at the thought that he was acting tough, but he was really just a softy in the inside. She watched him until she felt her eyes close and then she felt tired, then finally sleep took her over.

Saito walked into Souji's room to see him sleeping on the futon. He looked around the room until his eyes fell upon another sleeping figure. Her legs were rolled up as she rested her head on her knees, Saito gave a small unnoticeable smile at the sight.

He walked over and put one arm under her head and the other behind her knees carrying her bridal style. He continued out the door while Suzuki gave strange expressions on her face as she slept. She looked like a child but Saito felt a sense of relief with her in his arms.

He repeatedly wonder why as he carried her to her room. When he arrived at her room and placed her on her futon he heard her mutter, Mizuki, and he questioned who that was. But he decided to stop thinking of it as he was about to stand he felt a hand pull at his kimono.

His eyes returned to the sleeping girl to see that her hand reacted on his own. He sat there as he tried to gently pull away but seeing that her hold was to tight. He continued to sit there and decided to wait a while before leaving not wanting to wake her up.

Saito stared at her, _'_Hopefully_ things won't get to hectic with her around_._' _he thought as he looked at her to see her peaceful face and he had to admit even if it was to himself she was truly beautiful.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Yay! Finally a new chapter! I'm super psyched about what you think so far Please review it means so much & it helps me keep writing. **

**So...Read & Review! **

**Disclaimer = I don't own Hakuouki Shinsengumi Kitan but I wish I owned Saito! ^^ **

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Chapter Three: Trying Maybe Hard

Suzuki eyes fluttered open, she lifted her body which ached on one side. She looked at the door to see a figure standing there, seeming like they were deciding where or not to enter. Suzuki smiled as she quietly ran to the window, she stuck her head out and looked to see Saito standing there, "Why not come in?" she said as she saw him quickly look at her.

"I didn't want to enter with you still asleep." he answered as she gave him a childish look.

"Whatever, come in." she said as she disappeared from the window.

Saito slid the door open to see that she was putting away her bed. She looked at him and smiled but the sun caught her eyes so she turned away. "Its so bright." she whispered.

"Suzuki, are you hungry?" she heard Sano asked as he entered her room.

She turned around and smiled, "Not yet." she said after she had said that her stomach made a growl sound. Sano smiled down at her while Saito stared in wonder, "Want to rephrase that?" he said to her as she hid her face in embarrassment.

"Yeah, yeah." she said walking out of the room. They followed her to see her shaking her head and then smacking herself.

She walked into the same room where she was yesterday, to see everyone that was there the pervious day. She smiled warmly at everyone, "Don't fall for that smile, she looks like she wants to eat us." she heard Souji say with a smirk.

She looked at him and gave him a scary smile, "Aw, why'd you have to spoil the big surprise Souji-kun?" she said sarcastically as he responded with one of his freakish smiles.

Everyone laughed and Souji just scoffed as he looked away. They took their seats as Sano looked at Suzuki, "So, what was Hijikata-san like when he was little?" he asked with a grin.

"Sort of like how he is now except he was very….." she said smiling, she might as well play while she was there, "big for his age in width that is." she said laughing.

"I was not!" she heard his voice shout as he entered the room.

"Damn, he heard that?" she said holding a face of disappointment as he looked at her.

"Stop, telling lies." he said with a glare but shortly his face took its emotionless act.

"I'm not lying, I'm just not giving accurate information." she said with a smile as he gently slapped the back of her head.

"Its still lying." he said as he took his seat.

"Yeah, well this one's not a lie, Toshi used to be a heartbreaker." she said with a smile as everyone became interested, "Every girl that passed by him had hearts in their eyes and looked like they were going to faint." she said laughing, "And when it came time for the festivals there were about twenty girls all wanting to go with him." she said as everyone looked at Hijikata who held a face of annoyance. "But alas, there was no special girl." she said sarcastically as she put her hand on her heart, "Dare shed the pain." she said as she smirked at Hijikata.

"Enough, with the bed time stories." he said as he took a bite from his food.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." she said biting into her food.

"So, how did you meet? I know that Okita-san knew Hijikata-san when he was younger, but Okita-san doesn't know you?" she heard Chizuru ask.

"Yes, why is that?" she heard Souji question in a sly tone.

"I knew Toshi when we were younger, like little kids." she replied putting her bowl down. "And even then he was a meanie." she answered in a childish voice. "But he's still got that soft side to him, and to think he was the guy everyone feared, even men ten years older then them." she said with a smile remembering the old times.

"Though, he used to love going festivals all the time." she said with a smile at him.

"Enough, pestering about the past, Suzuki." he said not paying any attention to her.

Suzuki looked at him and mimicked his voice while doing ridiculous gestures. Making Heisuke and Chizuru laugh aloud while the rest tried to hide their laughs. She smiled innocently when Hijikata looked at her, "What?" she said looking at him with blameless eyes and a bright smile.

"You never change." he whispered as he gave her a small smile.

"You know what they say the more things change, the more they stay the same." she said smiling at him looking much like a child.

"You're very funny." Hijikata answered sarcastically.

"And you know it." she said with a grin. "Hey, where's the kitchen?" she asked as everyone looked at her. "What?" she questioned a little irritated.

"You can cook?" Heisuke asked a little hesitantly.

"That's very rude." she said as she put her hands across her chest. "I wanted to make some mitarashi dango, do you have a problem with that?" she asked very annoyed at their stares.

She then felt a pat on her head, "I'll follow you to the market to get what you need, and then you can make it for dinner, how's that?" she heard Sano say as she looked up to see his smile, she felt very secure, "Yeah." she said with a smile.

Saito watched as she smiled and laughed with everyone. He felt the warmth emanating from her, it gave him an unfamiliar feeling. Something he had never felt before, something that made him feel somewhat happy. _'What is it with her?' _he thought to himself. _'Why is it that I feel this need to protect her? Why do I feel the need to be beside her?' _he thought to himself as he caught Hijikata looking at him.

"Saito, are you alright?" he asked as Saito gave him a distance look.

"I don't believe there is any problem." he replied as he looked back at his food. Strangely it wasn't touched, he realized maybe that was the reason he hadn't been eating which cause Hijikata to worry.

"Saito-san, are you alright?" he heard Suzuki ask as he lifted his head to look at her. Her eyes filled with concern and her facial expression looked a bit uneasy.

He nodded as he began to eat at his food, "Don't worry, Saito always takes care of himself." she heard Heisuke say, it gave her a bit of relief but not completely.

"Oh, okay. I guess I worry to much." she said shaking her head and smiled as she turned away.

"Nah, I think that's sweet." she heard Shinpachi say as she looked at him causing her to blush.

"Well, aren't you the cutest." she heard Sano say to Shinpachi faking a loving face.

Shinpachi was about to argue back until he heard Suzuki laugh. He looked over to her to see she really looked like she was enjoying herself.

After eating Suzuki went back to her room, "Are you going to stand by the door everyday?" she asked Saito who looked at her.

"If that's what I'm supposed to do." he replied looking over at the cherry blossoms.

"Are you an only child?" he heard her ask, the sudden question stunned him.

"Yes, why?" he asked looking at her.

"Nothing, just wondering, isn't it normal to get to know the person that is going to watch over your every move." she replied with a smile.

"Why do you always smile?" he asked not realizing it said it aloud.

Suzuki looked away as she abruptly became silent, "I knew this girl." she whispered loud enough for him to hear, "And she did all she could to protect me, asking for nothing in return." she paused, "Nothing at all, but one day she requested, that I smile no matter what comes at me." she replied looking at the cherry blossoms. "If, I couldn't give her anything in return, making her wish come true is all I could do." she said looking at him and gave a bright smile. "Does that answer your question?" she asked as Saito sat down beside her.

"I suppose I do need to know more about someone." she heard him say, "to begin to understand them."

She looked at Saito and smiled, "You're awfully talkative today." he heard her say. "But I guess it isn't a bad thing." she said looking at the cherry blossoms, "You should talk more, if you're always quiet no one's going to know what you're thinking." she said looking up at him as her eyes became captivated by him. He looked so mesmerizing as he watched the cherry blossoms fall, Suzuki felt an attraction towards him.

Saito didn't reply he just stared at the cherry blossoms when he looked down he saw Suzuki's face. She looked beautiful with the scenery of cherry blossoms, he couldn't help but give a small smile to her.

Suzuki's eyes widen, it was rare if not impossible to see Saito smile. She could already tell what kind of person he is, distant and somewhat detached. Though, she did like how he looked with a smile on his face, she didn't want any other person to see this side of him. She then realized that her love was farfetched and that she wasn't fit for someone like Saito. She knew that he deserved someone _far better _then herself.

She quickly looked away, trying to hide her blush, she didn't care if he thought she was a nuisance, she just wanted to stay beside him. Even she knew that was a selfish wish but she didn't know why but Saito being there gave this feeling of completion. It was like he was the piece of the thing she was missing.

"I'll go get some tea." she said standing, bowing low so he didn't see her face and then she ran in the opposite direction.

Suzuki was walking with an aura of disappointment around her, "You're such an idiot, Suzuki." she said to herself, "Losing your cool and acting like a fool, what's wrong with you?" she said as she smacked her forehead, she wasn't paying attention to where she was going and then bumped into something hard.

She wasn't anticipating the bump so she didn't have time to catch her balance. As she braced for the fall she felt two strong and muscular arms wrap around her waist. She opened her eyes to see Sano smiling warmly down at her, "You should be more careful, I don't think you want to hurt yourself." he said as he helped her back on her feet.

"Thank you, Harada-san." she said looking at toward the ground.

Sano felt a frown take place of his smile, "Suzuki, what's with the formalities?" he asked as she looked at him with eyes that looked a bit watery.

"Nothing." she said as she was about to walk away when she felt him gently grab her arm, "I think I know what you need." he said as she guided her to the room where she practiced her archery.

"Hijikata-san, told me that this helps you relax, so why don't you try a few and then after you're finished we'll go shopping for your ingredients?" he said as she quickly wrapped her arms around his waist and gave him a deep hug.

"Thank you, Sano." she said as she looked up to him and smiled.

Suzuki got all she need and exited the store, she caught Sano standing outside waiting for her. She smiled at him, "Thank you." she said as he took one of the bags from her.

"Anything to get that unpleasant look off your face." he said as he pat her head and she blushed at his thoughtfulness.

When Suzuki and Sano got back to the headquarters, she remembered that she left Saito. She felt an impulsive feeling in her gut she mentally smacked herself several times. _'I told him, I was coming back and I never came!' _she shouted at herself, _'You baka!' _she yelled hitting herself.

"Ah, Sano, can you bring these to the kitchen I need to get something from my room." she said as he took the bag from her.

"Yeah, sure thing." he replied as she bowed at him.

"Thank you!" she shouted as she began to run.

"But I want to try your dumplings first." he shouted as she waved her hands in a gesture of sure.

She ran to her room, looking to see if Saito was there. She looked around and there was no sigh of him. She sighed as she smacked her head, "Why do I have to be an idiot!" she shouted.

She slowly walked back to the kitchen, still angry at herself. She felt a need to hit herself, for being so foolish. As she walked she saw Souji leaning against the wall, "Okita-san?" she called out as he glared at her.

"What?" he spat in irritation.

"What?" she repeated with anger in her tone, "You come out here when you aren't feeling well, trying to act as though you are excellent in everyway, when we both know that isn't true." she said with an fuming look on her face, "So, why don't you do everyone a favor and take better care of yourself!" she shouted as she felt Souji grab her wrists.

"And then what?" he shouted at her, "Pray that this disease will sudden disappear, hope that in some freaky way I won't be weak anymore!" he yelled at her as anger took every form in him.

"You have no idea how horrible it is to have this, you don't know…." he said but stopped when he saw tears form in her eyes. He let go of her wrists as she slowly lifted her hand to feel her tear.

"I don't…maybe I can't…" she replied as he looked at her. "But nothing is impossible." she replied as she looked at him, "If you try and stop doing things on your own, before you know it a miracle could happen." she said as he looked at her with a shocked face. "You don't have to do it on your own." she said as her arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him close.

"Why not let someone help?" she asked him as he slowly lifted his arms to wrap around her.

"Just for a while, can I use your chest to hide my weak self?" he asked as she felt tears on her chest and her head nodded slowly.

She smiled as she hugged him tighter, "Just don't take to long." she replied as she allowed him to let go, everything he was holding in all his fear of the unknown, all his anger for it having to be him, and all the dissatisfaction that he couldn't do anything about it.

She held him tightly, for she was afraid that one wrong push and he'd break. She feared that if they weren't careful he would sink so low that no one would be able to save him.

Saito was walking around he had been looking for Suzuki, but heard from Heisuke that she and Sano went out to shop. He was a bit irritated at the fact that she made him wait for about thirty minutes and never returned. He walked over the corner and when he opened his eyes he stopped dead in his tracks.

There sat Suzuki with Souji's head laid on her lap, as she gently stroked his hair. His hand held onto her free one as he looked like he was resting peacefully. He didn't know whether to continue to walk or to turn the other way. But he felt a tug at his heart as he turned and walked away.

Suzuki didn't think Souji would fall asleep but when she tried to leave he mumbled for her to stay. She decided she'd stay for a while and then go and cook. _'Cook.' _she thought as she gently lifted Souji and carried him into his room.

She placed him on his futon and gently covered him with a blanket. She then walked out the door and then to the kitchen.

She looked over to see that Sano left the things on the table, and there was a letter.

_Sorry, I had to go and do something. I'll return as soon as I finish them. I still want to try your dumplings before anyone else. Sano. _

She smiled at the letter as she put it aside and went to the ingredients. She made the dumplings fairly quickly, she had been making them ever since she was a teen. It soon became a hobby of hers, she just loved the smiles on everyone's faces.

She put them on a platter and left them on the table. She smiled as she exited the kitchen, she quickly walked to Souji's room to see that he was still fast asleep. She quietly closed the door and turned the other way she walked with her head down. She abruptly lifted her head and then was shocked at the sight of Saito.

Somehow, she lost her balance and felt the force making her fall faster. She couldn't catch herself so she decided to just fall, she closed her eyes and was ready for the fall. But after a few minutes no impact came, she slowly opened her eyes to see Saito's deep blue ones staring straight at her.

She felt a great blush on her face, she only hope that Saito didn't catch it. After she stayed on him for a few minutes she remembered where she was. "Oh…..I'm terribly sorry." she said quickly pulling herself off of him, but she wasn't watching where she was going and was going to fall off the edge of the wood.

She then saw him reach out and grab her arm. She felt him pull her towards him as if it was nothing, and there she sat in his arms. She felt strange, in Sano's arms, she felt like a friend leaning for help, in Souji's she felt like an older sister giving comfort, but in Saito's she felt so much more. "Be careful." he whispered as she looked up at him. She saw him staring at her with those same deep blue eyes, it looked to stunning with the moon shining against them.

She put her head down and leaned into him, "I'm sorry." she whispered, waiting for him to reply, hoping that he'd say something, anything that meant he understood her. "I told you to wait, and never came back." she said in a voice that sounded shattered, "You're trying your hardest, and there I go being an idiot to you." she said as Saito felt a tear hit his arm.

'_Is she crying?'_ Saito thought to himself.

"I'm sorry." she said as the tears fell faster and he felt her wipe them away, "And now I'm trying crying here so selfishly." she said her tears not ceasing, "But please, just don't give me away." she cried out to him, "I don't want to leave your side." she said as he left her hands grip onto his back in desperation.

She cried more until she felt his arms wrap around her. One hand around her back and the other on her head, "I'm not going to leave you." she heard him say, "Why….." he paused, thinking of what to say, "Why would I do that?" she heard him ask, his voice sound honest and pure.

"Because, I'm a hassle, I don't know anything and get myself into dangerous idiotic situations." she said in between gasps as if it were hard for her to breathe.

"Calm down, Suzuki." she heard him say as she felt everything stop.

She looked up at him, tears on the edges of her eyes, Saito gave her a questioning look. "This is the first time you called me by my name." she said as she looked at him, "It surprisingly makes me very happy." she said smiling up at him. She pulled away from Saito's hold and then stood up as she put her hand out for him. "We'll go together." she said smiling at him.

Saito forgot all this irritation towards her, all in that single moment, he didn't feel anything but content towards her. He gently took her hand and got up as they walked together to dinner.

"Suzuki!" she heard Heisuke shout, "Your dumplings are delicious!" he said as she say him stick other one in his mouth.

Suzuki's eyes widen, "You just didn't?" she asked completely shocked, "What…" she paused as she took a look at Sano, "You jerk." she said as smacked his back, "You promised I could try then Shinpachi and Heisuke wanted to try, then Chizuru asked." he said telling his story.

"Fine, whatever." she said as she took her seat.

"But Suzuki-chan, these are delicious." she heard Chizuru say, she turned to see her smiling brightly.

"I'll teach you how to make it sometime." she replied as Chizuru shined at her words.

"Really?" she asked as Suzuki smiled at her.

"Of course." she smiled as Chizuru jumped with joy and the others continued to smile at her.

She stared at the last dumping that laid on the tray, she swiftly picked it up, looked at it and then to Saito. She smiled and then gestured it to as he looked toward her as she smiled widely. She held it as Saito took a small bite from the other end. Suzuki waited for an approval from him when he slightly nodded his head and she smiled brightly. She was extremely happy that he liked her food, she didn't know where this feeling came from but she was beginning to like it.

Suzuki stared out the window as she sat on her bed, her hair dripping wet. She walked the moon shine in through the window as the breeze made her shiver. Then she felt a sudden pain in her side as she slowly laid down with a hurt expression on her face.

'_Not now.' _she thought as she struggled to get up, despite every bone in her body was aching. She hated when her body would ache so badly and so unexpectedly. As she saw a figure approach she began to lose vision, she felt somewhat afraid but rather indifferent about everything else. She then lost consciousness and her mind drifted off to sleep along with the rest of her.

She felt the moon's bright light shining on her as she forced her eyes to open. She quickly lifted half of her body, trying to figure out where she was. As her head examined the area she caught the sight of something that made her blush and then a large smile appear on her face. There he was leaning against the wall directly in front of her, his sleeping face looked so magnificent.

After seeing him in a state, Suzuki had found herself on her feet and walking towards him. She then kneeled down beside him, her eyes never leaving his gorgeous face. So many thoughts rushed through her mind, but the one that she couldn't answer kept coming back to her. Why was she feeling such things for a man who she had just met? Suzuki could not answer that, she didn't know why but she felt the need to be around him more, to see very expression, and to touch his soft and porcelain looking skin.

Before Suzuki could realize what she was doing, she felt her lips on his. Her eyes widened when she saw Saito's open quickly, Suzuki shut her eyes and hastily pulled away from him. She had moved to fast and landed on her back as she tried to hide her face.

'_What did I just do!' _she shouted at herself everything in her wanting to disappear. She had done something shameful and pathetic, and she couldn't handle whatever Saito thought of her reckless act.

"I'm sorry!" Suzuki shouted as she immediately rose to her feet and exited the room as fast as her legs allowed her to. She didn't look back not after doing something like that to Saito. _'He doesn't think of you like that!' _she screamed in her head over and over though the message didn't seem to get through. _'How could you be so stupid!' _she shouted as she tripped and feel to her knees, her face nearly coming into contact with the ground.

She wonder how far she had gone and when she lifted her head, she realized she was near the river that wasn't to far away from the headquarters. She turned around and saw Saito standing with his usually distant expression, she quickly turned away trying to hide her face in between her legs.

"Suzuki." he called with a voice that made her heart stop beating. After a few moments she lifted her head and gave a glance confirming that she was listening. Saito took a few steps forward as Suzuki stayed as still as a mouse, "I understand your actions." he replied as her head flew to look at him, "They were merely reactions from sexual feelings." he stated as she stopped and a disappointed look captured her face. "I will not hold them against you." he paused as she slowly turned away, "I will simply lessen the periods of which I am alone with you." he finished as Suzuki frowned to herself and then thought not to let it get to her.

She let out a laugh that made Saito somewhat uneasy, he had thought that she would argue or show a different emotion towards his solution. "Alright!" she said smiling and lifting herself up and dusting off her clothes. "Less alone time." she said clapping her hands and looking at him with a smile, "Problem solved!" she said walking past him and then letting a dissatisfied expression appear but as she shook her head her frown turned to a smile.

Though, the only she couldn't fix was the large pain that she felt in her chest. But she knew that a life with her and Saito together was something that _would not _ever happen.

As she walked toward the headquarters she sighed and whispered loud enough to hear, "Trying maybe hard." she stated as she continued to walk and she noted the awkward aura around her and Saito.

* * *

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